Where did they get that idea . . .

This morning Tucker was walking around the house flinging his arm out in a whimsical parody of a Nazi salute.  So I asked him, "Honey, what are you doing?"

He looked at me like I was a couple _______ short of a _________ and said, "I'm pointing."

"Why are you pointing, baby?"

"Because I have a finger, Momi."

It's been like that all day on the hill.  Surreal.  The phone went out this morning, and since I use a dial up modem, that meant that I was not only deprived of the opportunity to entertain myself by placing phone calls to my mortgage company, I couldn't read my SIR list either.  AAAAArrrgh.  no good thing can come of this.

I decided to make the best of the situation.  We really needed milk anyway.  So I stopped off at my neighbor's and asked her if she wanted to run to the store with me.  Of course, her phone was out too, and we needed SOME opportunity to chat or we'd both explode.  So off we went.  Got the milk.  As we were pulling back into her driveway, Michael said, "Hey, my socks are wet!"

The dog had gotten into the back end of the van with the groceries and chewed the lid off the milk.  (Not my precious Simone, no, this was the bad, bad, neighbor dog in standard form.)  The entire gallon of milk was seeping into the carpeting under the seats.  Yeewwww!

There was nothing for it but to turn around and go back to town.  So when Fugitive called on the cell phone to ask why I wasn't answering my phone at home, we were at the car wash hosing out the inside of the van.  It was funny.  Did you know that a power washer can cause things to fly out from under the seats of your vehicle that haven't seen the light of day in years?

That's why my van is parked in the drive with all the windows and doors and tailgate propped open so it can dry out.

An interesting thing happened while I was out of town . . .

Have you ever had a really great vacation?  One of those magical weeks where everything goes right and you keep pinching yourself to make sure you are alert and enjoying every moment?  Me neither.  But, I came pretty close last week. 

Then I came home.  Now don't get me wrong.  I'm not whining and moaning here.  I'm just saying that coming home was not the peaceful landing of our craft in a calm port.  Our cats apparently had way too much time on their hands while we were gone.  They got into my yarn basket (quiltnmomi is also crochetmomi, cross-stitchmomi, scrapbookmomi, and "almost finished a project once" momi).  There was yarn strung from one end of our house to the other.  From the looks of things, they got into some catnip and invited a few feline friends over for fun and frolic on the furniture. 

In addition to the yarn, there was enough fur on the floor to make a coat.  I don't know where it came from.  Both my cats seemed to still be covered.

My phone was dead.  Well, actually, its been sort of on again and off again since we got here.  I have no idea what's going on, but it isn't just me, it's my neighbor too.  I know because she's paranoid that "they" are coming to get her and when the phone goes dead she sends one of her kids over to see if my phone is dead too, (and have me use my cell phone to call in the problem.)  Her kids have gotten a lot of exercise today.

When the phone finally came on I discovered that I had 8 messages on my voice mail from my mortgage company.  Now, I'm a good customer and they occasionally call me with offers of a credit line for home improvement or some such thing, but generally not more than once or twice a month.  So 8 calls over a period of 4 days didn't sound good.  It wasn't. 

Somehow our account was flagged for their collections department.  Not because we have EVER been late on a house payment or anything like that.  No, their computer said that I had no proof of insurance.  I'm sure that would surprise my insurance agent.  Further, their computer indicated that I owed money for a "forced" insurance policy.

I tried to explain to the person in collections that a mistake had been made.  We do have insurance, the same insurance that we've had for all the years we've lived here.  I'm not one to complain about immigration, I take a "more the merrier" view of immigrants.  But, I do think that if you are going to have a job working in a telephone center, you should speak the language of the people you are expected to communicate with.  I'm probably offending someone now, so let me just say that you're gonna have to get over it.  When I call my mortgage company, I want to speak to someone who can understand me.

Finally, I persuaded her to transfer me to the insurance department.  Where a very helpful English speaking person was able to see the problem and correct it.  I was advised that it usually takes about 24 hours for the system to update and that I could call back tomorrow afternoon or Wednesday morning to verify that the problem was solved.

This afternoon, I got two more calls from collections.  On the last call I'll admit I was a little abrupt.  When I was asked, "When can we expect you to take care of this delinquency."

I said, "You can't." 

"But, Mrs. Verrette, this is your responsibility." 

"No, Miss collections agent, this is a mistake made by someone in your company who incorrectly entered insurance data, this is not my responsibility." 

"Mrs. Verrette, I cannot end this call without some arrangement for how you are going to pay this."

It was too much temptation.  I hung up.  See?  You can end the call without a payment arrangement.

I'm compulsive about paying my bills.  I pay everything in advance of when it's due "just in case."  I get a thrill putting a little extra payment on my principle - I feel like I'm scoring points against the big dogs who are trying to wring all that interest out of my hide.

After this afternoon, I can say that I cannot imagine what it would be like to live with creditors calling and demanding payment.  I have friends who struggle with their bills as a result of medical expenses or lost employment.  I only had collectors after me for one afternoon and I was ready to use all those words that Zoodom has taught me. 

Now, I need a vacation.  I'm up for Branson, or Florida, or Atlanta, or even Fugitive's house (she's finally learned to cook in her maturity )  I kind of wish I hadn't been so efficient in unpacking my bags. 

I saw something today that I've neither seen nor thought about it years.  Pink toilet paper.  Do you remember when toilet paper came in every shade of the rainbow - or had little colored flowers stamped on it for decoration?  I remember. 

My Mom used to complain because she had a purple bathroom and no one ever manufactured purple toilet paper to match it.  Her green bathroom was no problem to color-coordinate.  But, the purple one was always missing something in her mind since she had to either go with blue or pink.  Back when I was a kid, the only people with white toilet paper were institutions.  And we wouldn't be caught dead with institutional tissue in our home.

Fugitive has pink toilet paper.  Apparently, no one told her that our behinds are now too sensitive for the allergens associated with toilet paper dye. 

My friend Mary has suggested on more than one occasion that it would be nice if I would post a photo of myself.  I have resisted that urging.  For a number of reasons.  I'm the person in my family who takes most of the photos, so I'm rarely in one.  I never have a good hair day when there's a camera around. 

I finally have a photo of myself.  When we were in Branson, I visited one of those photo shops where manipulate the images.  I wasn't wearing make-up so I picked Xena.  Here I am as Warrior Quilt'n Princess.  What do you think?  Is it me?  I wish.  lol.  That's my face and chest, but Lucy Lawless is about a foot taller than I am so that long torso and limbs - only in my dreams.  I don't kow why I like this photo so much ... but I'm inclined to think it's the weapons. 

I wonder what Xena would have thought of pink toilet paper. 

Hidee Ho, Good Neighbor!

We left Branson this morning and are now in Arkansas.  Branson was fabulous.  They have over 90 shows, museums, restaurants, a mini golf courses on every corner. . . what more could you ask for?  Oh, yeah, the Stone Hill Winery was pretty cool.  They do "family" tours.  While Mom and Dad got to sample various Missouri wines (which were much better than I expected) the kids got to sample grape juice and sparkling raspberry.  Yummy.  (Okay, *I* really liked the sparkling raspberry.)

My sun burn is healed to the itchy and scratchy stage.  Fugitive says that I look brown.  So I guess it wasn't a total fiasco.  I'm definitely going to have to have a chat with my doctor when I get home though.  The pollen count in Arkansas is off the charts.  So I had to start my allergy medicine in addition to my arthritis meds.  I can't WAIT to be old and cranky with a heart condition or something.  I just know I'm gonna be one of those eccentric old ladies who takes so many pills she doesn't have room for breakfast in her stomach.

Anyway, the point of this is that both my allergy medicine and my arthritis medicine are the kind of things that will tend to make you drowsy.  I don't know that drowsy appropriately describes my condition.  As we drove down Highway 65 there were trees talking to me and waving.  That kind of thing would make me nervous if I weren't driving so I didn't have a lot of time to pay attention to them.

Now Fugitive is shaking her head at me.  She has already told me I'm not allowed to write anything long and profound using her computer.  She thinks it would shock her keyboard or something.  Now I think she's worried that my hallucinations will interfere with my awareness that it's time to get off so she can have a turn.

BTW - If you haven't checked out Fugitive's site lately, she changed it again and used a greeting card I sent her a couple years ago as the banner.  I loved that card when I bought it and I still giggle when I look at it.

The above links are brought to you free of charge courtesy of the Fugitive for President Campaign.

Good Morning Everyone!!! This is Fugitive    I have taken over Terri's site and am holding it ransom!!!  (just kidding)

I spoke with her this morning and she said that they made it to Branson yesterday about mid evening.  They are checked into the BoxCar Willie Hotel - she said that there are pictures of trains on the curtains, bedspread, and walls and all the doors.  She also told me that the first thing my nephew (Tucker) did when they got there was start jumping on the bed!  (sounds like fun to me, I wish I could jump on the bed!  )

They are supposed to get to my house about 5pm on Wednesday.

(Now, be sure and let her know that I kept you guys updated.)

Packing for Paradise

In just a few short hours (23 of them) I'll be sitting my behind in the comfortable driver's seat of my Mercury Sable and starting down the driveway on a new adventure.  Tim is celerating his 36th birthday and we decided to mark the occasion with a trip to Branson, MO. 

Yes, in this relationship, I drive and he plays flight attendant to the boys in the back seat.  I'm exactly 5 feet tall.  My arms don't reach from the driver's seat to the passenger side.  Tim is 6 feet 7 inches.  He can serve drinks to the body in the trunk without straining.

Now, how do I pack for such a trip?  Usually when I travel, I do it in the van.  But the air-conditioning still isn't repaired in the van, and while I had thought maybe I could tough it out and roll down the windows, the sunburn wiped all that out of my mind.  I want airconditioned comfort.

Travelling in the van, I have enough cargo space to take everything and anything that I think I MIGHT want to have on hand.  I pack the usual, books, games, snacks, my wheat grinder, a basket of half complete craft projects in case I get bored . . . if there's any room left over, I throw in a few clothes and my toothbrush.  If there's still room, I let the kids and hubby go too.

But, we aren't taking the van.  We are taking the Sable.  It has your standard trunk space, but that will barely hold my books, much less the sewing machine and doggie bed.  (Now that they have those new restrictions on luggage - I may never be able to fly again.  When I went to visit my friend Mary for a week last year, I took a complete set of luggage (four bags) a carryon and my backpack.)

Decisions, decisions - I'd better get my diet coke in hand, I'm gonna need extra caffeine today.

*******

Grioghair said:

There are more values in this world than can be totally encompassed within the Christian faith...for, what about the people in this world who are not Christian, by faith - do Christians forever ignore them as misguided - and going down the wrong path in life?

There are few things in life that irritate me more than when a person pulls out a verse of scripture from here and there to make a point, so I'll acknowledge up front that I'm doing that and I'll ask for you to trust me that there are a lot more passages available that speak to this point, but I don't want to make this a long essay - just a quick answer.

The "Law" - the Torah - contains the admonitions "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and strength" and "Love your neighbor as yourself."

When Jesus was asked "who is my neighbor" - he answered with the parable of the Good Samaritan.  What most of us don't realize is that to the audience that heard him speak that day, a contemporary equivalent would be the parable of the "Good Taliban."  Between the Jews and Samaritans of that day there existed a centuries old animosity based on religious and ethnic differences which included terroist acts.  There was no group of people more despised by first century Jews than the Samatians (whom they referred to as mongrel dogs on their nice days.)

Jesus not only taught the standard, he lived it.  He spoke to the Samaritan woman at the well.  He commended the Canaanite woman for her faith.  He said of the Centurion, "I have not found such great faith even in Israel."

Jesus' teaching is counter to the assumption that only the people of the household of faith have access to the truths of God.  Over and over again, he used the phrase "those who have ears let them hear."  He made it clear that anyone, at anytime, of any religious background could hear the voice of God if they only listened.  Paul continues this theme in his letter to the Romans.  The Pauline passage is usually quoted to unhold condemnation of pagans (those outside the faith) but the central theme he builds from is that ANYONE can know about God.  God's divine nature and eternal power are discernable apart from the revelations of the prophets.

"Always be ready to give an answer to anyone who asks you the rason for the hope you have but do this with gentleness and respect."  I'm on the dictionary thing lately, so I'm going to quote from the OAD on respect - admiration toward a person or thing that has good qualities and the politeness that arises from this.  If I want to live up to the standard taught in the Bible, I ahve to be prepared to treat everyone as my neighbor.  Deal with them out of a position of love and respect.  It isn't respect to speak from a position of condescending superiority.

Grioghair doesn't believe in sin.  I won't quibble over the word, I'll bet that Grioghair would agree with me that there are some actions and attitudes that in their very nature hinder the ability of people to relate and communicate with one another.  An attitude that says, "You are wrong, you have nothing of any value to say to me" is a pretty good example of the kind of thing that would make it impossible for constructive dialogue to take place.  I don't like it when I'm treated that way.  I think that anyone, be he Christian, philosopher, or scientist who starts from that perspective will soon find himself talking only to people who already agree with him, because everyone else will leave.

I'm Burnt

I don't like it.

I was outside today mowing the lawn.  I wore a hat.  I wore sunscreen.  I was only outside for a couple of hours.  I'm burnt to a bloody crisp.

I think I need my medication changed.

Seriously.

I'm taking meds for arthritis in my back.  I feel kind of embarrassed about that.  I'm young, I'm healthy, I feel like a whiner going to the doctor complaining of backpain.  But, without the meds, I can't sleep or stand up straight and I get really cranky.

My medication bottle says "prolonged or excessive exposure to direct or artificial sunlight SHOULD BE AVOIDED while taking this medication."

"Duh!"

So I'm sitting here wearing a sports bra because I can't stand my shirt.  No I wasn' mowing in the nude, but I was wearing my bathing suit.  Hey I live out in the middle of nowhere, and I was wearing SUNSCREEN.  I just wanted a little sun on my shoulders.

I'm leaving for vacation on Sunday.  It's Tim's birthday, so we're taking a trip to Branson, Missouri - then we're going down to Arkansas to visit family.  Tim's going to rebuild Dad's computer.  I'll use Figutive's computer to cruise around Xanga while she's at work.  Life will be good.  Or it would have been, if I weren't burnt.

I took the dog to the groomer, today.  I wanted her to be all purty next week when we go to visit the family.  I really like my dog.

Simone is a little concerned.  She's never seen me glow in the dark before.  I'm a little concerned.  She's never come back from the groomer looking quite like this before.  They gave her a "fancy" clip this time because I mentioned that I wanted her to look extra spiffy for the vacation.

She looks like BONDAGE DOG! 

I'm speechless. 

Well, What Do You Know?

Have you ever wondered how it is that we know anything?  This is one of those questions that I ponder on sleepless nights.  How do I know anything.  Is there a me inside my brain, or is thought just an illusion created by the firing of neurons?  There is a school of philosophers who insist that the mind is nothing more than brain chemistry, but these thinkers aren't getting very much support from neurologists.  Neuroscience recognizes the connection between the brain and the mind.  Brain damage obviously affects the mind.  But, while the components of the brain are necessary, it seems that they are insufficient to explain the mind.  Neural networks go a long way toward explaining how we think, but they aren't very helpful in terms of understanding why we think.

Leaving aside the question of why it is that we are able to know at all, I'm also interesting in studies of how it is that we learn and know.  What does it mean to be reasonable?  Is reasonable synonymous with rational?  Is there such a thing as objective knowledge?

Humans learn though sensory input, experience.  A baby does not possess language, there is no thinking involved, no reasoning through logical steps, but learning takes place.  Parents are able in a very short time to teach babies through stimulation of innate reflexes to suck and swallow.  But, no mother begins to teach a child to nurse by saying, "Okay, Johnny, today we will open our books to lesson one . . . "  Child development specialists tell us that in the first year of life, babies learn more than they will for the entire rest of their lives.  None of this learning utilizes reasoning or logic.

As we grow and acquire language, we conceptualize our reality in terms, words, metaphors.  No thought equals the thing thought of.  I can think of the image of a flower, but I cannot think the flower.  I can remember a song, but I cannot produce the song by thinking of it.  As we grow, our mode of learning shifts.  As an adult, if I want to know something about a subject I've never studied before, I will most likely find a book, or a knowledgable person to explain it to me.  But the way that we learn from books and others is by comparing their images - word pictures - to the experiences we've gained.  Reason is the end of the process.  All our learning begins with experience.  Without a proper frame of reference (which is really just a fancy way of saying prior experience of the subject) I can't learn anything new about it.

It's popular to speak of the difference between objective and subjective.  This is a distinction that I find silly.  All thought refers to some object, concept, or event.  In this respect all thought is objective.  In order for a thought to be subjective it must "exist in a person's mind, not be produced by anything outside it, not be objective" - well, by that definition all thought is subjective.  The sky does not produce my thoughts about it, my brain produces the thought.  However, my thoughts about the sky are in reference to an objective reality.

When a person says, when you say that you believe a certain thing based on your experience of it, that's merely subjectivity - I say "Duh!"  I understand what they are trying to say.  They want to draw a distinction between my experience and "objective" reality.  But, they are ignoring the fact that experience is a part of objective reality.  My friend, Mary, has a wonderful illustration of this point so I'll steal it from her.  It is hypothesized by some people that since all matter is really energy then our perception of ourselves as solid must be a illusion.   Mary challenges people who argue this way to slam their hand in a car door.  None of them have taken her up on it so far, because for all the discussion about the abstract ideas of energy and matter and the cosmos, the experience of pain is a part of material reality.

I've been told that there are some people with nerve damage and other conditions who do not experience pain.  These people have to be taught to avoid actions that will harm them.  But it is impossible to teach someone to feel pain.  You either feel it or you don't.  Much like seeing the color purple - you either see it or you don't.  A person who has been blind from birth can't conceptualize color.  Color, sound, touch, taste, smell, all these sensory experiences are related to the primary way that we learn and know. 

Once we have linguistic tools in place we can order our thoughts about our experiences and interpret them, but learning begins before we apply reason.  Knowledge begins with experience.  After the experience, reason may be applied in order to organize and interpret the experience.  But reason is always related to events in the past.  Logic and reason are useful tools.  With their help we are able to formulate statements about our experience.  With logic we can test our statements to see if they are "true."  Logic is not a tool for gaining new knowledge, it is the way we organize the information we have already gained through our experience.

Natasha said: Let's talk about having faith simply based on emotion.  Some people call it intuition.  I believe in intuition.  Some would even call intuition God.  I don't always have faith in my intuitions, because they are not always "logical."  I admire anyone who can have complete faith in them, though.  In fact, that is what I aspire to.  That would be what any transcendentalist would aspire to--to listen to what is in our hearts and trust that as the truth.

I don't have very much faith in emotion.  I can be happy, sad, angry, frightened, hurt, or calm all in the course of a day.  I'm not convinced that my emotional state testifies to any particular truth.  Intuition however, (according to my dictionary) is knowledge gained "without reasoning or being taught."  Intuition is the way that humans learn 90% of everything we know.  Intuition brings us new experiences and new thoughts.  Intuition must precede reason in order for us to have something to reason about.

SO _ drumroll please - Although reason cannot be applied to every form of human knowing, it is irrational not to recognize the existence (and act on the basis) of intuition.  Inasmuch as intuition is our ground of knowing, it is logical to say that intuitive experience of God forms a rational basis for discussion even when that intuition cannot be expressed by logical formulae. 

Blankityblank said: Truth is not about belief, though... or is it?  Is the act of proving something is true as much about believing that you are providing evidence that is (irrationally) conclusive? 

Truth may not be about belief, but belief is very much about truth.  A person who believes, trusts, or places confidence contrary to evidence isn't demonstrating faith.  Once belief is divorced from truth, the proper term isn't faith, it's superstition.  However, truth is not the same as proof.  Proof is a product of logic.  Truth is much broader than logic or reason.

I'm still thinking about Grioghair's words from Monday, and he left another profound comment since then.  I'll be coming back to his ideas.  There's a LOT to say about the points he's raising. 

Tucker is recovering today.  He played quietly with puzzles this morning and after lunch he lay on the bed and watched Michael play Nintendo.  If her were any other kid, I'd say he was getting back to normal, but for him this was just on the verge of comatose.  On the other hand, he didn't have any stomach troubles.  Thank you for the prayers and well-wishes.

I had some nice surprises today.  I was out cleaning up the yard and battening down the hatches in anticipation of the stormy weather predicted for the next couple of days.  I found that a bleeding heart plant that I had thought the goats killed last year has come back and is covered with little blooms.  My daffodils finally opened.  When I planted the daffodil bulbs last Fall, I thought I was planting paper whites.  I don't know what these are, but they have a double bloom that is really lovely.  Worth the wait.  This is our third year in this house and I can't tell you how cool it is for me to see that the plants I put in over the past two summers are coming back again.

I'm determined not to turn on the air-conditioning because it's just too early in the season.  Never mind that it was 87 degrees inside today and we are all sweating like pigs, this is our chance to acclimate to warmer weather, right?  Summer is hard on me.  I'm a hot natured person to start with.  I'm the last person to switch over to sweats in the Fall, I rarely wear a coat in winter, and I'm the first person to wear shorts in the Spring.

Tim had to work late last night.  He got home at 3 AM.  And before he came to bed, he set up the oscillating fan that he bought for me on his lunch hour so I could sleep comfortably.  Is he a hero or what?

Update - Tucker is surviving, thank you for the kind thoughts and well-wishes.  But, he isn't feeling well.  I broke down and gave the kid immodium mid-morning even though it clearly says on the package not to give to kids under 6.  He meets the weight requirement so I don't think it will hurt.  He actually got relief after that, until about a half hour ago.  then (as Michael says)  Yyyeeeeewwwwwwww!

Yesterday Grioghair posted the following comment:

Christianity - and I'm not condemning anyone in particular, just drawing parallels - has a habit of calling people Christians...in other words, just the fact of being called Christian means that they are already perceived as being a good people...so, they never have to make any groundwork towards improving themselves. (They have, so to speak, already arrived.)

Well spoken, sir.  I once heard Billy Graham say that one of the most desparate mission fields in the world is the pews of our Christian churches.  We live in an age where very few people know what it means to be a believer in Jesus, but a vast majority of Americans claim to be Christian.  There is a huge difference between saying and being.  I don't want to get on the kind of tirade that makes sincere believers doubt their salvation.  On the other hand, I think there is a lot of room to ask what evidence there is to support the claim that a person is a Christian. 

According to the New Testament, Christians live a certain way, follow specific principles, and are obedient to the guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Paul lists nine different tastes that you get in your mouth when you deal with a believer, "peace, love, joy, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, patience, kindness, and self-control."  No follower of Christ tastes good every minute of every day, but it is fair to ask "how am I characterized."  If my friends and family are telling me that I'm known to be unkind, harsh, judgemental, angry, argumentative, impatient . . . you get the picture. 

James says that "faith without works is dead."  I've heard this verse taken out of context to try to make it seem as though it's necessary to earn salvation.  James doesn't say "Follow the rules faithfully enough for long enough and God will let you in," he says that people who have faith don't have to tell you, they act it out.  And people who don't behave in a way that is consistent with the teaching of Jesus, don't really have faith.   Faith without works .... Hmmm, sounds James read yesterday's blog.  LOL.  I can say all day long that I believe that Jesus was the Christ, the Son of the Living God, but unless I live my life in accordance with his teaching . . . well, in English we have a word for people like that.  We call them hypocrites. 

In every age there has been a charge of hypocrisy levied against the Church.  I've heard it, and I'll be honest, I've said it.  Of course there are hypocrites in the Church (or at least on the rolls.)  And the good news - the gospel - is that there is always room for one more.  But the other half of the gospel is that having come to belief - you have to take the next step and work it out.  Exercise.  Grow in faith and love and hope.  I've never met a perfect Christian.  But, I've met far too many who were content with their imperfections.

If you've been around evangelical churches you've probably heard the slogan - sitting in a church doesn't make you a Christian anymore than sitting in a garage makes you a car.  In fact there are a number of different terms the New Testament uses for people in the Church.  Believer, redeemed, beloved, family, brother, servant - the word Christian is only found 3 times in the whole New Testament (twice in the Book of the Acts of the Apostles and once in a letter that Peter wrote.) 

Maybe that's because being a believer, acting on your faith, understanding that you are redeemed and beloved of God, taking your place in a family where you can be counted on to serve your brother . . . that's what it means to follow Jesus. 

Well, Grioghair said a lot more, but if I'm going to demonstrate patience and self-control, I think I'd better stop for now.