October 4, 2008

  • Above Average

    My son has picked up a less than wonderful habit.  I admit he got it from me, but that's no excuse.  Whenever something is ... not great ... he says, "That SUCKS."

    I know, there are worse things he could be saying, but obviously there are plenty of better things he could be saying that would be more acceptable in the presence of his grandmother.

    My best friend has a saying that I like, so I'm encouraging Tucker to substitute, 'That's below average ..." for that other phrase.  And by encourage, I mean, I'm making a conscious effort to say that as well, or something else that's a little less crude.

    But thinking of all the below average things we encounter, makes me think about the above average things we might strive for.  Knowledge, wisdom, and character come to mind.  And by character I mean someone who is kind, patient, forgiving, courteous, humble, generous, courageous and honest. 

    I freely admit that I have some room to grow in all the above areas.  I'm not sure I'd characterize myself as "below average" but then I'm not striving for average.  I want to be above average.  I want to be among the elite.  I want to be on the trajectory to exude the peace of the Dalai Lama, the kindness of a Mother Teresa, the patience of a Martin Luther King, Jr, the courage of Lucious Lamar, the generosity of Bill Gates, and so on. 

    I don't want to settle.  And I'm tired of hearing words like "elite" used as an epithet.  I set high standards for myself, and I'm told that more than I give myself credit, I succeed in achieving my goals.  I've realized that I'm very uncomfortable hearing praise or hearing that I've done something exceptional.  It makes me immediately want to qualify by saying, "well, yes BUT ..."

    In addition to adoption of the phrase "that's below average" to describe a distressing turn of events, I think I'll be adopting the phrase, "thank you."  I don't have to be the Dalai Lama or Bill Gates in order to be on the path to achieving the kinds of greatness they exemplify.  I'm shooting for a place among the elite. 

Comments (7)

  • What the?  You're already there.  

  • Wise wise woman. The finest people and parents are those that are striving to be more.

  • I love the "thank you."  It's one of my mantras.  

  • as a young person quite a while ago, my response to a less than ideal situation was, "bummer." every now & then when something really yucky happens even now, donkey's brother talks a long look in my direction before he says that...

  • I *hate* hearing kids say "that sucks" - and my kids do it quite often.  Yesterday we were at Home Depot, complaining about the 4th failed attempt to deliver our washer/dryer and the horrible customer service all along, and my 7yo said "Home Depot sucks."  Which was true, but I was really embarrassed that she used that word! 
    I think I'm going to try the "well, that is certainly below average" line around my kids, haha.   Or just plain old "bummer"!! 

  • I hope that "below average" thing doesn't rebound on you unpleasantly somewhere down the line.  In some ways it is a harsher judgment than "sucks."

    I'm certainly going to share the "jelly bean" comment with my guys.  Perceptive kid you have there.

  • giggle...

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