Happy Birthday, Mary
"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage."
-- Lao Tzu
There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance.
Today, is my best friend's birthday. We have quite a story between us. Best friends when we were 12 we used to sit on top of the jungle gym in my parent's backyard and write. Stories that we'd no doubt laugh and cringe over today. But they were words on paper and back then the paper seemed much more exciting than any real life boring stuff..
Then Mary's parents moved away and we lost touch with each other. Twenty-five years, Mary found me through the miracle of the internet and sent me an email ... Hey, remember me? We were best friends once.
We're best friends again. Over the past five years we've laughed, played on the beach, cried and argued with all the passion of two brilliant people each convinced that the other is totally out of her mind. I'm happy to report that we both weigh less now than we did five years ago even if we both weigh more than we want.
We still write although we prefer a more comfortable chair these days.
There have been a lot of times over the past five years that things in my life have been chaotic. Okay, so maybe the better way to put that would be that there have been a few times that things have NOT been chaotic. Mary though, she isn't anything nearly so poetic as the wind beneath my wings. No, she's more like the boot in the seat of my pants that keeps me from quitting before I get to the end of the race.
I was trying to think of an appropriate birthday greeting and wish for my friend, and it's hard. But I got that quote at the top of the page in a daily motivational email and it's perfect. If there's one thing about me that irritates Mary, it's that I constantly battle with fear. I'd prefer to think of all my worries as something of a charming quirk like you might give to the secondary characters of your novel to make them seem more real. But I have a suspicion that it must get tiresome that everytime she mentions a Dr's appointment I start hyperventilating and thinking that means she has a brain tumor.
Because Mary loves me and believes in me I have the strength to do things that would have succeeded in defeating me without her unwavering support. Because I love her too much to be a total leech, I have the courage to do things I'd never have attempted on my own.
Few people are blessed with the kind of wealth I enjoy, but I offer a wish and a prayer that you will have a friend like Mary.
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