October 5, 2004

  • Power of a Picture


    I read it years ago in a wonderful book called "The Blessing",  there is power in word pictures.  I can talk to myself all day, give myself the lecture, quote the affirmation, (and these things help) but if I want to really turn my attitude around, I need a solid word picture to hang my hat on. 


    Two weeks ago, I got the image of the rock.  I'm still referring to that picture often.  See, I still have all the circumstances that were paralyzing me before I got that picture, but now when I feel fear rising in my throat, I remind myself that rock is bigger than I can lift.  I actually have a particular rock in mind when I think of it.  It's the rock from the Garden of the Gods that has the kissing camel formation on the top.  (I'll try to get a photo for you, it's really spectacular.)


    The point is that the very thought of me trying to lift that rock is so ludicrous that I laugh, and it's hard to be afeared while I'm laughing. 


    Last week, I get a second image.  It's not completely original, but I've made it my own.  See I've learned that I have this little voice that tells me that I "don't deserve" - for years I didn't deserve to have the marriage that I longed for, so I settled for the one I had.  For even more years, I didn't deserve to make myself a priority, so I didn't take care of myself the way I knew I should.  These are biggies, but the little voice pops up all the time to point out new and exciting examples of things that I don't deserve. 


    At first, I thought that the voice was guilt.  It's not guilt.  Guilt is the logical and appropriate response to having done something wrong.  I haven't done anything wrong.  The little voice that creeps around the corners of my mind and spews venom to poison my confidence, my self-esteem and my ability to make sound decisions to take care of myself ... is the voice of shame.  Guilt says, "I made a mistake."  Shame says, "I am a mistake."  I ran across those definitions a couple months ago, but I still hadn't appropriated the antidote for paralyzing shame.  I found one.


    Now when I start to hear those whispers that would have me believe that I'm a mistake, that I'm bad, that I'm weak, that I'm not deserving, I picture a red-assed baboon.  I'm apologize to my sensitive readers, but that's really the only good way to describe this critter.  Shame is a baboon jumping around and tearing things up with no ability to comprehend the value of the property being played with.  So whenever I sense that the baboon has escaped, I blow my mental whistle and smile while the zookeepers hustle it back into it's cage.  See, I know that the baboon is smart enough to escape, so it doesn't alarm me when I hear it nearby, because I also know that all I have to do is blow the whistle on it's little monkey act. 


     


                Shame


                                on


                                              You


     


                                                                              


     


     

Comments (19)

  • I like this... what you are doing.  Thanks for sharing it with us.

  • I think that's a great way of looking at it hun.

  • I love what you've said about guilt.  Thank you for that.  I have been spending the past 5 years feeling guilting for many things - all of which were either out of my control or not my problem.  I let other people make them my problem and allowed myself to feel guilty for them.  Thank you!

  • I once was listening to a wise friend of mine talk...he was saying that thoughts, words, ideas can all 'breeze' through our minds and we don't have to jump on top of each one. He then had 4 or five people walk past him saying they were each 'thoughts' and when the 3 person past him he jumped on the back of the person. The example really hit home with me. I do not have to jump on every thought that comes in my mind and most of the thoughts I jump on are, quite frankly, negative accusations and negative imaginations. I can get myself in a pool of despair when I 'jump' on those thoughts. Knowing I can just let the thought pass in the breeze is so freeing...then I can wait for the thought, idea, or word that is truly inspiring and go for a ride on that one. This blog so reminds me of that idea.

  • The kissing camels are cool.  Don't poke your feet on Yucca trying to get a picture!

    Shame.  The real shame is that there are some who don't know it.  Amoral godless selfish savages.  I'm talking about humans, of course.

  • Well.....I suppose I'm a sensitive reader.......but not so sensitive that I can't appreciate you blowing the whistle on a red-assed baboon.  Keep a'blowing! 

  • Priceless.  I'm glad I know you, girl.

  • hee hee (or...  ooh ooh aah aah) - babooooooon!

  • I find again your fine discussion , Terri . So intelligent .

    Love            Michel

  • You're as brilliant with your word-pictures as you are with your plain words!  You've got that baboon whupped already, Lady, but by conjuring him up. 

  • A picture is supposed to be worth a thousand words...and even THEN most sheeple are illiterate

  • this is a great post. visualizing definitely helps us all. good vibes.

  • I feel this way often since the divorce and a series of other events.  So... could you get me one of those zoo-keeper calling whistles please?   That red-bottomed critter isn't much fun.

    Have a prosperous week!

    Hugs and love,

                          Deb

  • Oooo... red-assed baboons.... Very fantastic visual for guilt!  Mind if I borrow that idea and the whistle?

  • Don't know why, there's no sun up in the sky
    Stormy weather, since my man and I ain't together
    Keeps raining all the time

    Life is bare, gloom and misery everywhere
    Stormy weather, just can't get my poor old self together
    I'm weary all the time, the time, so weary all of the time

    When he went away, the blues walked in and met me
    If he stays away, old rocking chair will get me
    All I do is pray, the lord above will let me walk in the sun once more

    Can't go on, everything I had is gone
    Stormy weather, since my man and I ain't together
    Keeps raining all the time
    Keeps raining all of the time

    I walk around heavy-hearted and sad
    Night comes around and I'm still feeling bad
    Rain pourin' down, blinding every hope I had
    This pitter andd n patter and beating, spattering driving  me mad
    Love, love, love, love, the misery will be the end of me

  • i know this person...the pre-image person.  i'm sitting inside her right now terri.  damn.  you nailed that whole thing...the "i don't deserve" part was so close so very close to home and heart here.

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