July 28, 2003
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Terms of Use ... or Abuse?
I've been blogging here at Xanga for over two years. During that time, I have seen squabbles and hurt feelings break out on Xanga like acne on a 15 year old with a chocolate addiction. But, I've tried not to become involved in them, I just leave my little hearts and smileys and cyberhugs and go on. As far as I know, I haven't made any enemies here.
Every community has rules. Unwritten rules for success such the more you comment and eprop others, the more comments and eprops you will receive. The unwritten rules tend to emerge without design or intent, they just happen. Written rules on the other hand are a reflection of the community's desire to define itself. By establishing specific Terms of Use, the Xanga community is saying to each other and to outsiders - this is the kind of people we are. (You can read the Xanga Terms of Use Here.) It doesn't surprise me to study the Term of Use and realize that our rules have nothing to do with technicalities of code, and very little to do with regulation of site content. The Xanga Terms of Use are primarily about relationships. WE are primarily about relationships. In a very real sense, Xanga is not a web site - it is a community. And we are very concerned that the people in our community find it a safe place to be.
Recently, I ran across about the 7th blog that was opened specifically for the purpose of harassing someone on Xanga. Following procedure, I contacted the Xanga Team and gave them the links to the blog in hopes that they would take action. I did get an email thanking me for calling it to their attention, but then the action they took was to notify the blogger that someone had complained. The blog site wasn't directed at me and the blogger doesn't know me, so the blogger assumed that it was the victim who complained and escalated the harassment. (Going so far as to post personal identifying information.)
I'm not interested in naming names or getting into specifics of that situation for two reasons. First, because it makes me feel sick in my stomach to think that I might even inadvertently be the instrument of spreading a vile and malicious attack. But more importantly because the problem is broader than that one nasty individual. We pay for our membership in the Xanga community. And Xanga has posted Terms of Use. But the Terms of Use are not enforced consistently. And complaints are ignored. (or mishandled)
I'm not at all in favor of censorship. I may disagree with what you have to say, but I will defend your right to say it. Until or unless you exceed your right by infringing upon the rights of others. The Xanga Terms of Use are pretty clear. But they are useless as long as they remain unenforced, unfairly enforced, or inconsistently enforced. I know that I'm only one small blogger in the vast Xanga community. So last week, I invited a half-dozen people from my SIR list to join me in writing today, asking Xanga to please enforce the terms of abuse. I had hoped very much that at least a couple of them would respond. Every single person that I asked is today posting a blog on this topic, plus other people who responded when they received the email as a forward.
This surprising response says to me that the members of the Xanga community are not willing to stand silent while abuses take place. The decision whether or not to take action against a site based on anything other than whether or not the site violated the terms of use is arbitrary and unfair. Xanga Team - we want to see you put some action behind your words. When abuses are reported to you, we want to see the abusers either remove the material or have their sites closed.
I know that in the past, I've wondered whether or not there was more to the situation than met the eye. How was I to know whether email had been exchanged behind the scenes? I'll admit it, I've wondered whether or not the victim somehow provoked the abuse. I'm ashamed of that attitude. That attitude assumes that the "good" people will be protected while the "bad" people will get what's coming to them. Folks, if that's true then we are all in trouble because from time to time we are ALL the bad people.
I ask you today to please do your part to encourage the Xanga Team to address abuses. Email them when you see material that violates the terms of use. Tell them that when one abusive site is allowed to remain, we all suffer as a community. Tell them that we want the terms of use to have meaning. Tell them that we can all imagine what it would feel like to be the target of abuse, and that we aren't willing for any of our number to suffer.
Oh, and there is one more thing you can do. Visit the sites of other Xangans who are writing on this topic today. My second fond hope today is that when I click on the link for the Xanga Featured Content list - it will be full of blogs that are calling attention to this issue. (And BTW, if you want to join this movement, email me or leave a note in my comments section and I'll add you to this list of links.)
Check out:
Lovingmy40s
smoothsailing
DawnsEarlyLight
DreadPirate TinaCantrell
Blankity-Blank
Zelda_Pinwheel
xdreadx
Moonstone
Kluless
KrisinLuck
Draigstudio
Verona
Craktpot
HeavensPromise
moniet
**Many Thanks to Craktpot for making the button at the top of this blog. Please feel free to take that graphic and add it to your own site as a way of showing your support for The Fair and Consistent Enforcement of Xanga Terms of Use.
And adding their voices Today - we have
FreekyCheek, Tinkerfae, BettyC
Anna elfinmoon srlucado Scriveling
vxnmom MissBecky Easter Egg Daffo
Comments (82)
Rules, Rules, We Want Rules!!
*sigh* Isn't it too bad we need rules? But as long as we do: yep. Consistency is the key.
Great post, Terri. Thanks for getting this going.
Great blog! I too have discovered harrassment and abuse, and contacted Xanga several times about it. Each time, nothing at all has been done. The harrasser continued to post and bother, with no consequences. I finally gave up and chose the easy way out - ignoring it. I hope Xanga will learn from this crusade, but I'm doubtful.
Hi ya cutie! I meant to tell you I was sorry to hear about your hurt finger last night but I got side tracked! I am so confused!!!! What is going on? Have people been getting ridiculously flamed since I've been away? Can't we all just get along? :::sigh::: We need to just band together and kick some ass!!!!!!! Count me in!!!! *hugs* I've missed you and....and Happy Monday to you!
Kira
This is a great idea. I blogged on it.
It's people like you who make the world safer.
Looks like everyone things this was your idea....
You ROGUE you!!
Sail on... sail on!!!
I think this is great. I'll send them an email too. I happen to be one of those people who think of Xanga as more than just a web site too.
What a great idea. I didn't realized that this was an issue having never run across one of the blogs you described.
I'm with you on this, too. I read about it at vxnmom's just a few moments ago - and had to come and agree. Thanks.
You know I agree. Thanks for including me in the "movement."
I've added the button and put a short entry on my blog as well.
ok - I was late getting mine posted this morning but it is up now - let me know if I did ok ....
you can definitely add my name to the list.....
Thanks for caring....and doing something to help....
good idea
THUD! The pirate left props! Help me off the damn floor!
Cheers, Teri. You rock.
Let's keep Xanga a clean and safe environment.
--Scott
Great post.
Yahhh we are hitting Featured!!!! (I mean the Featured ALL SITES) not just Premium!!! Whoo Hooo
I added a couple of words on the subject.
Not enough eprops to give you here. Great great idea.
Great blog! Adding more props, and linking to you too!!!
Xanga is supposed to be fun and I am all for it!! Add me please!!
I am tired of seeing great Xangans leave because of something/someone.
Way to go for bringing this out!!
personally, i think free speech is quite important. the down-side, of course, is that you get hate-mongers and idiots who also speak. but i don't think that's necessarily a bad thing because, for the most part, the more those idiots are heard, the more idiotic their ideas are understood to be.
however, if we're supposed to be obeying rules here, there's certainly nothing wrong with expecting them to be enforced. good job!
"This surprising response says to me that the members of the Xanga community are not willing to stand silent while abuses take place."
Very true indeed! I value freedom of speech and opinion very much, but racism is where I draw the line. In fact, I mailed the Xanga Team about a 100% crystal clear case of abuse last Friday (I'm still awaiting an answer and haven't seen any results yet), because no one should get away with that. And if they can get away with it, what's the use of the Terms of Use? If it's ok with you I'd like to add your "Advocating Xanga Kindness" graphic to my site, with a link to this weblog as to give it even more attention, because it deserves all the attention it can get.
I came to your site through FreekyCheek's btw
"Oh, and the XangaKindness button was designed by craktpot (Teri Emerson) anyone who has difficulty getting it to their page can contact her or me and we'll email it to them. "
Thank you...I will edit my posting to add this information.
--Scott
Rock and Roll, Girl...
My blog's up now too!
We are rocking here!! I hope Xanga is reading!!! =) C~ (the other C me)
You go girl!!! (snaps fingers) Tell it like it is, and preach to the congregation.
helloz ur on the feature content
We need a blogring
I hate to bother, but would you give me the link then, so I can put it at the top of my site...By the way I love your site, it's very simple; Very nice..Take Care!!..and Thanks!!
gotta wonder if they ever look back and say what was i thinking. Craig
This is great. I have seen unwanted comments left by others in a few sites. It's really too bad. Xanga has brought me alot of new friendships and has given me place to write. There is no room for this here.
Please add me to the list. I will assist in anyway I can to stop this type of harrassment. Thank You all for caring. This is a very good thing...indeed.
jester
We should all treat this community like the very one we live in.
Great post!
ignore my previous comment. i know you're all for free speech, and i didn't mean to imply that you weren't. i'm just straddling the fence a little. i think if we give assholes enough rope, they'll eventually hang themselves (or just peter out). but, if we restrict them, they only find one another, and then form their own groups, with more influence.
however, i was thinking more in line with racists and hate groups and such. i should've considered the run-of-the-mill dumbass who's posting someone's personal information. yes, that is not only against the rules, it is as close to violence as you can get on-line.
Excellent blog! Great idea! I will send an email. My little site died for Xanga's consistency issues (almost as much as my lame content and general laziness).
I may have to spark life back into Ubiquity - but not as a paying customer. I just can't bring myself to give Xanga any more money... does that make me one of the bad people?
I do agree and ive never been to your website until now. I came here from Tina's site. I belive in peace and kindness of course im guilty of breaking that rule many time's im sad to say. But i promice to do my best to change that and thank you for reminding me. hug,s fancy
Terri, I had no idea what you were referring to in your comments. I'd not read any of these blogs about terms of use. All I knew was I'm sick of people being judged and hurt around here. I wasn't about to let another one slip quietly away. Feel free to link me.
I'm takin' the button too!
I am so happy!!! we are doing it!!!
Tina
I haven't had time to read this post yet, but I promise I will read it. I just wanted to say thank you for your sweet, lovely comment that you left me. It meant a lot. -Kate
Great blog. I didn't have time to get mine done until now. Actually, I think i misunderstood and didn't realize we were all blogging on this today, since i just blogged on it the other day, but it is important to me, so I went ahead and did another one. This is such a great idea- you sare to be commended!
I blogged about it too... you can add my name to the list as well if you like
.
Thank you, Teri, for your articulate objections.... It would be helpful to send emails to the Xanga team once more (to flood their email box actually) so that they'll remove this person(s), but without the name, how will they do it? I will email them myself, and I'll simply tell them to look through their emails to determine the identity of this abuser and terminate their account.
Great information. A lot of which I was not aware of either. Thanks a bunch.
Have a good evening.
Jess
the problem is, the more rules you make, the more people will want to break them. You can make the dumbest rules in the world (hey! you can't put that ice cream cone in your shoe because its after 11pm!) and people will break them. for the sake of breaking them. As for the content of people's sites, the ridicule and racism, the po-no and the slander, that comes with life. hard to accept of course, but wherever you go, wherever you come from. its there.
welcome to earth.
I can't tell you how glad I am that you've mobilised people in this way. It's going to be very hard for them to brush this aside. Please add my name to the list; I've posted a link to this, plus the button, on my site.
I'm going to sound like a broken record by the time I hit all of the sites that blogged on this, but I totally agree, and I was really pissed when they did nothing about the psycho that harassed Cheryl. Add my name to the ones who blogged about it too.
What's been happening since I left?
This is really a problem of the way Xanga is set up - it allows people to set up numerous accounts basically for the purpose of flaming people...this is one of the reasons that I left Xanga - although I am posting very infrequently still. I am really too thin-skinned to allow myself to be upset on a continual basis - and not just from abusive flamers...it even goes to the level of people expressing very opposing vehement views on people's sites. (That happened to me, not much - but enough to make the joy of Xanga disappear very quickly.) Xanga then became a stressful place to be around.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, there are some very dangerous - maybe even psychotic - people lurking around on Xanga...and they may be even people you don't suspect of being that way - it is just the world, writ small.
I doubt if you will be able to eradicate it totally, the way that Xanga is set up - it needs rigourous code restructure.
Xanga community is made up of fools and geniuses alike - and it is sometimes hard to decipher which is which, sometimes.
But I agree, codes of conduct need to be enforced.
Hi. I just wanted to let you know I am in total support of this. Very nice site, by the way.
It's unfortunate that ppl had to experience something like this, and I know someone here on Xanga who just went through that.
Thank you for putting this to light and I wholly support this!
Great idea. You go girls!!
Good for you! While I haven't witnessed the kind of evil you have observed, I just don't understand why people can't even disagree with one another in a respectful and civil manner.
Just popping in to add my support!!
Good old-fashioned yet effective grass roots action plan. You and your companions are to be commended. We may have to harness this into a "Neighborhood Watch" blogring until we have more Xanga gods.
I'm glad for what you have started. Thanks for standing up
I hope this helps!
Hi! I'd like to join your group and will try to affix that button, but I'm not very good at graphics things. Please tell us how to email Xanga people. I have never seen a place to send the owners anything.
Good luck with the project and God bless you and your efforts.
PS, is that you in the profile box? Very beautiful!
My reaction to harrassment and abuse is to flee from it. But, better yet, maybe I should carefully read the Terms of Use (thanks for the link, by the way). I generally find that my operating mode is so far within the Terms of Use of any site in which I participate, that the first read is enough.
If someone like you (and all the others, many of whom I recognize as even tempered folks) sees this as an issue, then I probably should examine it more carefully.
Thanks for your lucid post.
Mike
I haven't had any problems myself; but I know by reading there are many who have. What you wrote is fantastic. Yes there should be fairness we are a community! I have enjoyed my wonderings here in Xanga and don't like tho think that there are people who caused such sadness and unhappiness by harrassing people. It must stop! It seems that there are always those 'they' people who are causing trouble for the few. I hope Xanga hears us !
@-}-}-
You're an inspiration... I support you 110%!
I'm one who left (though I still come by to read you and a few others) because of this very thing. Thanks for making the effort. I hope you have better luck than we did.
Great post. Good, important issues.
Sorry I haven't been posting lately. Hugs to you.
it's sad that we must have rules in a weblog ... which is suppose to be a person's uncensored diary or log ... but i guess like in society we must have a guideline that everyone can follow ... it's people who abuse and test the system who brings things down and hurt everyone that's innocent ... have a good tuesday! aloha
sigh.... sometimes the mean comments make me want to quit xanga. but then again, maybe it helps me accept criticism and be a stronger person. I believe in freedom of speech. you can post what you want on your xanga and I won't attack you. it's when people start writing spiteful comments for the hell of it that I get mad. basic human decency and respect is needed here on xanga...
i'm with you on this one! have blogged on the issue
thanks for the graphic 
Congrats on having the Number 1 rated weblog today. Let's hope that gets their attention.
--Scott
Certainly add my name to the list, I've been thinking about this since it started brewing, the result of the brainstorm was posted at my space. Your thoughts are welcome.
This is sad that anyone has to even blog on this subject. Xangaland has lost many a good person due to this crud or, like myself, changed their names and closed down sites to avoid these lovely people. I'm afraid I'm one of the oldsters here(when blogging was not a trend but a strange 'thang' one had to explain to people) and I know as long as you have people who are willing to be open with thier feelings, there will be people who are willing to take advantage of it.
No wonder people don't attempt to get to know their neighbors anymore
YES!!!
I didn't think this would tick so many people off did you? Ah well.
propzzzzzzzzzz times 1,000,000
i'm going to post a topic now!
Xanga's TOS exists not to serve the xanga community but merely so they don't get sued.
Great post. I hadn't really thought of the harassment issues until I saw another one of my readers, Moonstone, do a post simlar to this and then Blueyoohoo's. I don't get a chance to scower Xanga very often so I pretty much read the same people all the time.
I treasure my Xanga time and the great friends I have met on here. I hate to think there are such evil people out there waiting to make trouble for others. If you don't like the site you are reading or the person doing the blogging...then don't read them adn definitly don't comment. the harrassment just ahs to stop. I will do a small post too today, because this kind of thing is awful. Our Xanga gods better start controlling the situation a little better or they might lose some great people.
Great post again
Im like you,...hate to see fellow Xanga-lites end up with bad feelings toward each other. And the unwanted comments left on sites. There is no room for that here. Like everyone else, it's too bad we need rules here. You can add me also. I have visited Tina's site and Smoothie's and others voicing my interest in combatting this problem.
thx jester
Xanga is no longer enjoyable for me now. I end up saying things to the flamers that I ultimately regret, and would normally not say if I were calm, but something about those comments really urks me. Recently, one guy called me a "fake Chinese whore." But you're right, I'm no longer replying to them. Instead, I'll ignore them, and allow the authorities to handle them (hopefully).
Thanks for the gift of this wonderful blog. We all needed it. I blogged about it.
Much Love, Stephanie.
HEY I want in on this.
Haha. Sorry but I have to laugh. This is a website for people to write freely about whatever they want. If you don't want bad comments, then you know what you do? You block out the right for people to leave comments or you block the abuser from leaving comments. If your going to say something in your opinion then take it like a man and be prepared for people to disagree. In your "community" does everyone get along and is everyone Happy-Go-Lucky? Hm, don't know what town your livin in. Me? I need some diversity. Hey, if you got something basty you need to get out? Damn, leave the comment in my Xanga. If I don't like it, I'll DELETE IT...ha, ever think of that?
I mean hey look, I'm seriously not trying to be one of your "abuser's" but I'm just saying, it's just a website.
Comments are closed.