April 3, 2003
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Got Happy?
If we only wanted to be happy, it would be easy; but we want to be happier than other people, which is almost always difficult, since we think them happier than they are. Montesquieu
Several blogs I've read lately have been on the subject of happiness, what is it, how can we get it, what to do with it if we have extra. 'Happy' is one of those words that has changed in meaning over the years. The original idea was "favorable circumstances." I can't think of anyone who has used the word with this understanding. One of my favorite Xangans listed all the happy circumstances of his life and concluded, but I'm not happy. He's not alone in this dilemma.
How have we come to this point? In addition to wealth, health, and other circumstantial blessings we demand a joyful mood, a euphoric flight, or an ecstatic transportation. Because joy, euphoria and ecstasy are intense and difficult to sustain, we have the impression that happiness is equally ephemeral. We devalue our blessings because we see that they do not bring us the ecstasy we crave.
Are we such adrenaline junkies that we cannot value the quiet pleasures of contentment, satisfaction, and security? Through long millennia, the capacity to live in extreme emotional states has been associated with mystics, idiots, and other weird types. Many cultures have honored these people, but all cultures set them apart as unusual. Not us, we look at the mystic and the sage with suspicion. Why are we not able to sustain a "happiness" that seems to come easily to them. What's so special about that guy that he should get bliss when all I get is my average home, my average spouse, my average child, my average job, my average hobby, my average mind, my average body, my . . .
Maybe its the me-centered philosophy of our time and place that has deceived us. We rebel at the thought that we just might be average. We are convinced that we can have it all and indeed feel cheated when we don't get it. On one level we know that's silly. One person has physical coordination in excess of another and we except that even with training and perseverance, we cannot all equal Tiger Woods, or Michael Jordan, or Michelle Kwan. Another person has intellectual capacity beyond the norm and we except that we cannot all equal Albert Einstein. Why should we all have the impression that the ecstatic life is somehow exempt from the influence of innate disposition, training, or level of skill? Why should we chafe at the thought that we aren't automatically entitled to plug into cosmic ecstasy and ride the wave of euphoria into mind-numbing bliss on a daily basis?
Comments (20)
Oh boy, one of my favorite subjects. Yes, I DO have happy!
“Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God.”
At least that's how I see it. Have a happy day!
"...mystics, idiots, and other weird types..."
There ya go! I knew I'd find a niche!
Oh and, thankyou...I now have that "if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life" song going thru my head...at 6:45am.....errrggh
Stuff to ponder.
I don't want to be happy. I want to feel at peace regardless what circumstances I find myself in. I think that's a lot to ask, but I have a lot of moments when I actually have it.
Feith
i think it is boring (not to mention drugged?) to be eternally euphoric. sometimes i crave plain old contentment. or a little peace (not the grand scale of peace in the world, though that would be good, too, but that state of being at peace with everday circumstances).
They say that one's happiness should not depend upon another person. I was never 100% happy until I met my husband, and I have not been 100% sad since.
(hope that makes sense!)
I don't think a lot of people are even close to average happy. Maybe that's just how it seems to me from accross the abyss. These days, I'm pretty darn happy with life, even among the crap intermixed therein. I'm a happy person with some struggles. Unfortunately most people are stuggling with some moments of happiness.
The best thing I've heard yet is that "Happiness is not an emotion. It's a decision." And, I can't put it any simpler than that (though a bit of explaination might be in order... maybe I'll be up to the blog someday...)
I am an adrenaline junkie who is unsatified until or unless I can be riding that euphoric high you spoke about - I just keep searching for my next "boost" ...... maybe that is my problem .......
i'm hearing 'happiness is a warm gun' by the beatles.....
happiness is a choice.
Happiness...
Is a state of mind. Part of our (we westerners) problem is that we're addicted to materialism. We hanker, crave and yearn for the material, and largely tend to ignore what may be the real sources of happiness - compassion, love, joy, peace; and when we finally realise that the newest computer, biggest car, bigger house, flashier clothes simply don't bring these things to us - then, and perhaps only then, can we finally start to be happy. Yet we still refuse to acknowledge these simple facts. We're addicted to our "things", to getting more "things", and we're under the impression that without "things", we just can't *be* happy.
Happiness lives on the inside, and can never be gained by external means alone.
VERY good points you make here. The whole idea of how much is enough and the concept of simple contentment....very well put.
i'm happy when i dont put myself first, when i dont have to control, or be jealous, or angry, or want, or need.
Do you mean to tell me that you CAN’T plug into cosmic ecstasy and ride the wave of euphoria into mind-numbing bliss on a daily basis?
Well damn man! Looks like its back to the Dread Pirate School of Cosmic Ecstasy and Euphoria wave ridding for you young lady. I told you not to sleep though class. But then again you passed advanced rum chugging and deck swabbing…
Sail on… sail on!!!
It is a good subject to think about - I am happy but not pleased with a lot of things in life, I don't feel that they are the same. But even though I am irked at some of the things I am living with, I am still happy with life overall.
Be thankful for little things i guess. I sometimes forget about that.
Thanks for telling me about the little red x's
... I'll fix em.
Q
o/
God Bless - Dale
Desire = the opposite of happiness. All we get in this country is the pursuit of happiness -- a perennially unsatisfiable desire for something other than what has come easily for us. To be happy with something is a denial of the American dream! To be satisfied is a violation against 20th Century consumerism and the foundation of our economic system!
Stop being happy. Stop being satisfied with what you already have. Because if you're happy, the terrorists win.
Mystically Weird.. oh thats me...
BBChel
Some of the comments here gave me quite a chuckle. And then you have a couple that have been very good
eg. "Happiness is not an emotion. It's a decision."
I like this one. Quite some time ago I came to this conclusion. My 'cup' was more than half full, so why did I keep looking at the empty part?
Happiness and euphoria are different things to me. I have experienced euphoria a couple of times in life - Oh what a high! but we cannot live with this on a constant basis. But a quiet, happy, contented feeling is mine way more often than not now, once I made the decision to see the good in my life.
very good writing
.... I want to say I have joy-- happy is temporary. Joy is there all the time whether you're happy or not. But the secret to Joy is the knowledge and understanding about God. 
A warm spot on the deck, a comfortable deck chair, a cold (but not too cold) beer, a good mystery novel . . . ahhhhhh.
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