November 6, 2001

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  Whoopie Cushion –

  
  

  I want to know what maniac thought it was a good idea to give my kids a whoopie cushion. I am really tired of walking through the house and hearing Ppppphhhhhhht! Followed by hysterical giggles – "Mommy, did you hear that, did you hear that, that was a BIG gasser."

  
  

  I thought that I had escaped the whoopie cushion for a little while today when I discovered that we were out of cat food. I’ve been out of milk for two days, but hey – the kids can drink juice. Let us get low on cat food and THAT’s an emergency situation. So we dashed off to the store. I picked up the cat food (and milk) and went back out to my van. Flat tire. You have to understand, I had an appointment to have two new front tires put on my van in TWO days. But the thing just couldn’t wait, oh, no, it was flat as yesterday’s cliché.

  
  

  So I limped the thing up the street to the Ford dealership. Of course, I got there as every mechanic in the place was leaving for their regular Tuesday lunch meeting. Now I’m sitting in the lounge with my kids waiting. The Ford dealership in Salem is staffed by a very nice bunch of people. They have stocked the waiting room with vending machines, magazines, coloring books, and toys. I know where they got their toys. The same toys we saw in the toy box were the toys I dropped off at Goodwill six months ago. My kids greeted them like long lost friends. "Hey Mommy, they have a fire truck that looks JUST LIKE OURS! – Hey Look! Their siren is broken in the same place ours is!"

  
  

  Now remember, I was just running to the grocery for cat food and milk, so I didn’t have any extra money on me. No checks, no credit cards. After all you only need a couple bucks for the kind of stuff I was going to guy and hey, I had a ten dollar bill in my pocket. I had to call my husband on the cell phone and explain to his voice mail that I was in a predicament. Then I had to wait, and wait, and wait. Finally he called back. He was great, spoke to the service manager and arranged to have the cost of the tires put on his credit card. My kids were great. They were playing quietly in the corner while I was dealing with business. Relieved is not the right word to describe how glad I was that I wasn’t going to have to sell one of them on the street corner to cover my bill. I flopped back down on the couch in the waiting room.

  
  

  You guessed it "Ppppphhhhhhhhhht!"

  • 8:58 pm
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